I believe there is an unrealistic fear that challenges many people in my line of work, and I bold enough to address it even if others are not.

There are certain elements within the fields of SEO and social media marketing which cause many misunderstandings and hardships for reputable people with good means and good intent. People have chosen many names for the people representing those bad elements, but one stands out more prominently than others. For now I’ll call it “the D word”, and it is something wise people must be cautious of being grouped with.

It seems that the bad elements in social media and SEO have caused some quality people to become unreasonably afraid to properly promote their goods or services. It affects many other industries, and it seems to have created an overall hypersensitivity which causes many people to just hint about how they actually keep their business running, rather than be upfront about it. This is often an unreasonable fear, but definitely worth some consideration. I’ll explain this with a story.

Have you ever noticed that there are a lot of people trying hard to have a big social media audience? I’m sure you’ve seen things like television shows promoting their Twitter and Facebook. You’ve probably seen companies running contests and offering free goods if you will just follow them. You’ve undoubtedly seen the links all over the Internet screaming “Follow Me”. On the more absurd side, you’ve likely had complete strangers with nothing in common, and no real interest in you, follow you or send you a friend request, just to add to their perceived worth.

A couple years ago, I described it as the “Twitter Follower Frenzy“, and it still persists.

Seeking an audience is not all bad, but it is one of the more misunderstood components to social media marketing. It has been widely promoted that if you can gather a big audience, it will provide some unrealistic value to your business.

Once the audience is assembled, many people talk about “engagement”, but then don’t even know what that really means. They will say how important it is to “engage” your audience, so a lot of companies take that as just trying to make friends and be chatty with everybody they can.

Friends are fine, but that is not marketing. That is networking, and social networking can do amazing things for your marketing, and building social media equity is important. However, by using tactics without a strategy, social networking alone will lead most companies to huge disappointments.

Many people have a very confused view of social media, and I can understand why. If you just look at all the ways social media is used, there should be little wonder how people confuse the issues. Some of the most bewildering concerns I notice surrounding social media are the return on investment (ROI) and the cost of social media marketing.

Millions of the world’s businesses understand by now that an investment in social media is vital to their success. Tragically, many of the same businesses are generally clueless about how and why they spend money with social media, and how to optimize their spending for the best results.

These same confused companies are further complicated by misguided notions that social media is limited to, or primarily intended only for personal socializing. They are the companies who question why a business would use Twitter, because that is where people announce what they had for lunch, LinkedIn is just for job-hunters, and Facebook is where old high school friends swap stories. That is social networking, and networking is important, but it is only one facet of social media. If you confuse this, and think that social networking is the basis for social media marketing, you will waste a huge amount of energy trying to sell to your friends, and others who already know you.

There are some blogs I feel bad to neglect, yet delighted when I make time for them. They are the blogs where I intend to be more active, and I want to share some of those with you. These are blogs by people who truly understand the many good reasons to blog, and they work hard to be useful to their communities.

First, I want to explain a bit about why I am recommending these blogs, and how I think you can learn a lot from them. If you don’t have time read, just hit the play button (top of page) to flip on my podcast and skip right to the list.

Did you ever go to a blog and find that the other people there were actually communicating with you? I don’t mean just a short and pithy answer, but rather an actual conversation that takes place. I mean the kind of blog where you see the same people every time, answering questions, solving problems, sharing ideas, and actually conversing just like they would in a coffee shop, or over lunch.

I know some blogs like that, and I enjoy them very much. It is not only because of their topics, either … I enjoy the people. Of course, I don’t spend a lot of time with blogs about things which don’t interest me, but if these blogs were about termite ranching or how to grow poison ivy, I would still be there … time permitting. I learn from them, and on good days, they learn from me.

There is a mentality which some people and companies have about mixing personal and business relationships that paints an unfavorable picture of this combination. Mixing business and personal life has frequently been viewed as a mistake for businesspeople. The problem is that “businesspeople”, and even the term itself, implies something other than “people”.

Who do you do business with? If you encounter somebody in a given business setting who is less than personal toward you, do you look for somebody else who will appreciate your business more? I do, because I like to do business with people I like, and trust … and who like and/or respect me, too. An impersonal approach is personally appalling to me, and I think it fails at all levels.

Prices don’t get in the way, because if I don’t like somebody, I will walk away even if they are offering a huge discount. Even product quality takes a back seat to trust and comfort in my purchase decisions. The numbers show me that I am not alone with this, and that millions of people feel the same way.