Social Media and the Underestimated Value of Being Liked

It is Nice to Be Liked!
It is Nice to Be Liked!


When you think about your social media marketing efforts, it may be easy to consume yourself with all of the facts, figures, demographics, psychographics, website visitors, and how getting it all just right will help your business to succeed. I have written what feels like a squillion words about reaching the right people, being useful, gathering data, dissecting the data to measure your marketing efforts, and other fine things.

Something that I find a lot of people underestimate is the value of being liked. I do not mean “liked” in the sense of somebody clicking “Like” on Facebook, either. I mean, actually being likable and not just because you are offering your awesome stuff at spectacular prices with free shipping. I mean giving people reasons to hold you, or your brand, in high regard.

Each and every one of us has a level of trust among our friends. Even the worst people you will ever meet have the benefits of clout. Even if it is only their mother, there is somebody who holds them in high regard and cares about their opinion. The most common reason is that they are liked.

It reminds me of something a good friend of mine says as he nervously awaits his results each election year. He says “As a politician, I can only count on two votes … mine, and my mother.” Fortunately for him, he is very well liked, and he was recently elected for his fifth term in the Kansas Legislature.

A truth that every successful politician knows very well is that even with the best political platform and massive visibility, it will all fail if they are not likable. This does not just mean being likable enough to get elected, but likable enough to create action in a desired direction. You can still polarize people and be liked and respected. In fact, polarizing an audience is a good way to know who really does like you.

With little exception, each one of us has a group of people who respect us, like us, listen to us, and follow our advice. Being likable is not always as easy to measure as we prefer, but if it was, we would probably all walk through our lives feeling really bold and confident about how we influence somebody … at least somebody.

In case you ever doubted it, this should come as great news for you. You have influence, but where did you get it? If you think about this, it often comes from being liked, more than from any other factor. You may doubt it, or have a bad day and overlook it sometimes, but being liked, or lack thereof, is a big factor in the success of almost anything you attempt.

Like and dislike are not the only two options. There is a wide chasm of indifference between the two. If you want to be liked, you must give people reasons. That is how you move them across the chasm.

Testing the Theory of Being Liked

As a test of the value of being liked, let’s picture two people. It does not really matter what they do for a living, but we will say they are “rocket surgeons”. They went to school for brain surgery and followed it up to become rocket scientists. Both are clearly smart and capable, but which one wins?

Rocket Surgeon Jim is a person you respect highly for his genius ideas and brilliant works in his field, but you do not consider him overly likable. He is polite, but he is just not the kind you gravitate to at a party. Something about Jim seems uncomfortable, and you sometimes wonder how sad and boring it must be to be Jim’s wife. Jim is not a bad person, but he seems a little bit “robotic” and not much of a people person.

Rocket Surgeon David is somebody who is perhaps a notch or two less genius than Jim, but you like David very much. He is quite competent, but his likability alone seems to open doors for him. Just the mention of David’s name brings about good thoughts, and he is the kind of person you like to be around … or maybe even the kind of person you want to be more like.

Which rocket surgeon do you think will find more success in their endeavors?

The value of being likable comes in widely varying degrees, but it always matters. In my estimation, you are probably not too excited to do business with “Rocket Surgeon Jim”, right? Further, you will probably not recommend him to others, like those people I mentioned, who are influenced by you.

Now, if you turn this around and think about how others will respond to you if they do not like you, it is easy to see how it can hurt a business. I mean any business, and even the most genius ones, doing the most brilliant work. Being liked does not just mean keeping people from disliking you, but also actually giving them reasons to like you.

I do not wish to imply that you must be a people-pleaser, but giving reasons to be liked and not just being “robotic” is worth the effort.

Likability Applied to Social Media

The power of being liked is especially evident when you apply it to the vast, and fast moving vehicle of influence, which is social media.

Being genuinely likable, whether as an individual, or as a brand, offers the best possibility to improve the chances of achieving your objectives. If you neglect the importance of being likable, and you just operate as a machine, you are missing the biggest of all assets. Even the least suspecting people you meet will influence somebody, and if they like you, something great could happen.

Published by

Mark Murnahan

I have been in the Internet industry since the mid 1990's and I picked up a lot of great knowledge in that time. I blog about it here at aWebGuy.com. I am available to improve your visibility and your market share using SEO and social media marketing. Contact me for consultation.