Do you remember who your friends are? If you care about them and respect them, why not consider how they earn a living? Times are hard for a lot of businesses, and it may mean more to them than you think. More than that, you may eventually regret going elsewhere … where they will appreciate you less.

I am reminded of a story of two friends, John and Mike. I introduced them many years ago. John was the number one real estate agent in town, and Mike was seeking to sell his house, and buy another. One day, Mike called John and asked him to evaluate his house for market, and make suggestions for improvements to increase the sale price.

John was glad for the call, and he offered his professional time and efforts to help Mike. A few days passed, and John discovered that Mike had listed the home for sale … but chose a different listing agent. As the top agent in town during a good time in real estate, John certainly did not need the commission, but was disappointed because he had wanted to assist our friend Mike in the sale, and subsequent purchase. Plus, he had been somewhat crudely taken advantage of professionally, by his friend.

I am excited to hear from you if you can relate to this. Have you ever had somebody ask you to do something and use the phrase “when you have some extra time”? It may be just fine if a friend says that, while asking you to go and do something fun. When it attacks your profession, there is a line to be drawn.

I get this “extra time” concept thrown my way almost every day. I am not joking or exaggerating about this. I know that a lot of other professional service people get this, too. It is hard for a lot of people to understand that when your product is knowledge or time, it still has a cost.

Yes, even those intangible things like rubbing brain cells together to create a spark, blowing on it, and turning it into a flame actually have a real and measurable cost. So, how can we deal with this, and make it understandable to people who think there is some magical “extra time” laying around to hand out for free?

It seems apparent that old sayings like “time is money”, “you get what you pay for”, and “time is our most valuable resource” have outlived their usefulness. They have become as cliché as a passing stranger asking “how are you doing?” They don’t really want to know how you are doing when they utter that. Try it out the next time you hear it, and give them a big earful and you will see what I mean. People often overlook respect for other peoples’ time with a similar disregard.

Have you ever been stood up? Maybe it was a date, a business meeting, a telephone call, or many other possible ways that somebody did not follow through with what they told you. Do you remember how that made you feel? I can tell you that it is one way to end up in my recycle bin, and I am not the only one who feels this way.

When people do not follow through on their words, it often becomes a personal matter. It is insulting. It can even strangely cause a sense of shame or guilt for the recipient, with thoughts like “Well, I guess I was not all that important to them.” More often, it will bring about a dismissal of the individual’s words, both past and present. It destroys trust, and in business, that is a tragic fate which often negates even the best marketing efforts.

Decorum is defined by Wikipedia as “Appropriate social behavior; propriety” or “A convention of social behavior”. Since it is a social topic, the standards of decorum are different depending on the social group. Yes, the people count, and what may seem completely innocent to you could be a great offense to another person with a different imposed expectation of decorum. It is more important than ever to be aware of the standards of decorum as it applies to your business, particularly due to the vast mingling of social media in business.
A lot of people talk about transparency in business these [...]