Social People in an Anti-Social World

Should social media be renamed to “friendship media” or does that kill the business?

There is something really bitchy about social media. People tell people how to “do it right” and then a bunch of people hash it out and poke fun at the ones who “screw it up”. It is all just so confusing. Am I supposed to be social or not? What is social? Does social equal personal? Is business anti-personal? Get your thoughts moving and join this discussion of social media.

Here are three important questions to consider about business and personal interactions as they relate to social media.

  • Are you less likely to buy from somebody who is too personal? If this is the case, then why do so many businesses using social media keep believing it when others insist that social media is strictly friendship media?
  • Are you less likely to buy from somebody who is too “business”? If this is the case, then why do people feel awkward about doing business with friends?
  • What is the tipping point, and how do you view the balance?

Social Does Not Mean Anti-Business!

I hear a lot of people talk about social media as if “social” means that it should not include anything relating to business. That is quite laughable, really. If it has to do with how you achieve your food supply, I would say that it is pretty downright personal. Perhaps a few too many people do not understand the fact that social, although it applies in many ways, is not the opposite of business. Social means “relating to human society and its members” and that includes many things. That does not mean it is all a party and that we do it just for friendship. Yes, it even includes business. So how do we relate this?

Having something to offer in exchange for something is not a horrible thing. Kids in a lunchroom learn bartering early by trading a cookie for pudding or a ham sandwich for peanut butter and jelly. Sure, there may be conflict from time to time, but just because it includes items does not mean the interaction is less personal.

I witnessed an example of this in my own home just moments ago. We had a guest overnight. It was my son’s lifelong friend, Jacob. Our families are friends. At about 10:30 this morning when his mother was picking him up, she told my wife that she needs a birthday cake for Jacob’s brother, Caleb. Caleb is turning four. He wants a Star Wars cake.

What is the Relationship and Where Are the Boundaries?

My wife is a fantastic baker. I mean, her cakes are really something special, and I would put her up against any pastry chef for the best tasting and beautiful cakes. Our friends have known her talent for a long time, and always loved it when she brings a dish to the party.

When Rebecca asked her to make a cake for Caleb’s birthday party, does it seem odd that Peggy quoted her forty dollars? Does that seem impersonal? Does the tone change when I tell you that my wife and I own a cakes and confections company. Did something change here? Are we any less personal? Are we still friends, or did we just switch hats and become all-business?

Do We Change Hats to Do Business?

I guess for some people it can seem uncomfortable to do business with friends. The strange flip side of this is the fact people want to do business with people they like and trust. Where are the boundaries and how cynical is it to believe that we should not be friends because we do business or do business because we are friends?

Some people would see it that Rebecca should have gone to the grocery store for a cake. After all, if Peggy screws up the Star Wars cake, Rebecca will probably hate her forever. Strangely, Rebecca would probably not hate the grocery store for screwing up the cake, but with a friend, there is a different expectation.

Maybe she only came to Peggy because she feels obligated. Maybe not. Maybe she would have asked Peggy to do it even if she was not in the business.

The Relationship of Friends and Business

This is a question and not a dissertation. What do you believe about the boundaries of friendship and business? You want to know, like, and trust the people you do business with, right? Is there a level of closeness of the relationship that takes you out of the market for that person’s services?

Consider the three questions I posed earlier and tell me what you think.

Published by

Mark Murnahan

I have been in the Internet industry since the mid 1990's and I picked up a lot of great knowledge in that time. I blog about it here at aWebGuy.com. I am available to improve your visibility and your market share using SEO and social media marketing. Contact me for consultation.